not writing

you know the type. i'm more of a thinker than a do-er. i always mean to do something and have good intentions. but still i do nothing or at the most - very little. it's not just the lazy bug. i'm scared of success. i would rather take the easy option and fail than do well. self sabotage. it's in my blood. but i've reached the point i've reached before when i have to do something before it drives me nuts. i have to get this out of my system. like the poems and short stories i've written before. composed only at the point of desperation. written in the middle of the night when the words have kept me awake. writing them down is the only route to silence. i know i should write more often. that would stop this endless thinking. but if i start. could i stop? Let's see...